New and Improved To Do List!

Thanks to all your comments, I have a new to do list!

1. Post to do list. Perhaps it will be eloquent.

2. Throw pile of papers to be graded down stairs. Like confetti! Look how pretty!

3. Steal time for myself from someone else. (Cancel last class before spring break aka Passover/Easter vacation. Teachers get sick, too, ya know.)

4. Nap. Mid-day. A day of sloth is good.

5. So watch The Goonies. Repeatedly.

6. Eat a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Obviously, it should be Rocky Road.

7. "No, body! Shut up, I tell you! Forget the diet!"

8. According to my comments, one pint is not enough. Eat another.

9. And some Cadbury creme eggs. (Ok, so I added that one myself.)

10. Don't forget the Chuckles.

11. Wow, this is the best diet I've ever been on!

12. Announce to the person who reached this site via Google search for "Do I love Jill?": "DUH! Of course you do! Why else would you be Googling her!" Double duh.

13. Hold an anaconda. No! I mean, a real one. I hear it's all the rage with teachers down in Florida. Hold a real anaconda. The metaphorical one comes later.

14. Shake things up. Does listening to "Shake It Up" count? The New Cars are touring with Blondie, after all.

15. Repeat after me: tomorrow will be better. Sunshine and high notes not required.

16. Speaking of which, go to Times Square. Find the red-haired singing hooker. Kick her ass.

17. Wear flip-flops in the snow.

18. Whoops, that's all gone. What if I throw that fake snow left over from the Christmas decorations all over the kitchen floor? Kinda like pixie dust. Do you think everyone else I live with would like to play pretend Peter Pan in flip-flops when they come home?

19. Dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true.

20. Avoid towns near melting glaciers. I hear people can be pretty cranky when stuff starts leaking through the crack.

21. Lie on couch. Watch DVD's.

22. Preferably of midget porn.

23. Wait--I watched The Wizard of Oz yesterday. Does that count?

24. Throw a party.

25. Get some. Anaconda. You know, the metaphorical kind. I hear that's available to chicks like me.

26. Oh yeah, anacondas dig me.

27. Countdown to TequilaCon. (That's an open invite, people! Check it out!)


Looks like I have a busy weekend ahead of me! I'd better get started.

Hey, is that an anaconda or are you just happy to see me?